Ladies Of Unklebry Vol. ??

Okay, here is another blog entry for the day.....this is a record, two entries in less than a week, amazing! I figured I would throw on some pics for everyone to gaze at.....first we have Pink......Most people tell me she is all mannish looking or something, but I dont see it......there is something hot about her.........dirty and nasty, but hot. I can't really explain it, and this is not one of the pics where she looks really good or anything, but you can see her nipple, and I am all about when chicks flash the nipple, so I had to throw this pic up. Then we have that scab Courtney Love.......damn, she looks like hell.........one of the guys on the Metal Sludge board saw her at a bar in Hollywood the other night hanging out with Pamela Anderson.........there is a combo for you, huh? Anyway, he was saying that Courtney has now put on a ton of weight and her face is all beat to hell (not like beat up bruised, but just nasty looking)....so I did a little looking today to try and find a recent pic of her and stumbled across this gem of a pic.....dunno who the other chick is.........don't really care, as she looks scary.

Okay, back to Pink........like I said there is just something about her, but one thing bothers me........her nipple looks a bit goofy..........do you agree? Maybe it is just me, I dunno, lets take a closer look, shall we........(look at the close up nipple pic and tell me what you think. I know the nip is squishing against the fabric and all that, but it is just goofy looking............oh well, it is still all good. (At least according to me).

Anyway, on to the entry for todays "Lady of Unklebry"

I am going to go with one of the Nebraska experiences here............this takes place (if I remember right) a little over a year ago........I will set this up by telling those of you that are "in the know" about some of my adventures that the "beer bottle girl" incident (well the 2nd time that happened) took place barely 24 hours before this incident I am about to describe...........when the weirdness happens, it happens a lot, and all at once.........damn.

Anyway, I was working the 3pm to 11pm shift at work, and driving back and forth every day to Kearney, and 2 or 3 times a week I would stop off in Holdredge (about the halfway point of the drive home) and have a cocktail with a co-worker named Mort. Of course both being single guys who appreciate ballet and the arts, we would stop at what passes for a Gentlemens Club in this area. This place happens to be called "The Tower Hotel and Lounge" Not the classiest place you have ever been, I mean it makes "Tops and Bottoms" in Wichita, KS look like a friggin' Palace or something, but back to the story..........I arrive at the bar, head inside, stop and order my usual vodka tonic (not Stoli, as they don't carry it.......their idea of Top Shelf is Absolut...........don't even think about trying to order Grey Goose or Belvedere) and sit down to survey the ladies that will be providing the evenings entertainment.........I see them and am not really interested in seeing their naughty bits.......just not doing anything for me at all, so I roll on over to the little table top video games (you know, Run 21-Tri Towers, that kind of thing) and start playing.

Program interruption for a timeframe message...........Remember I get off work at 11 pm, and have a 40 minute drive to this bar so it is about 11:45 when I roll in and around 12:00 when I sit down at the video game.......now throw it in your head that bars in Nebraska close at 1:00am, and of course bar clocks make that more like 12:45 when they kick everyone out.........so I have roughly 3/4 of an hour to have a drink or two and be on my happy ass way. Back to the story.......

So I am playing this video game and not really paying attention to the little stage or the gal who is disrobing on that stage.......just groovin on the game and sipping my drink, probably smoking a Camel Light.....and then someone pulls a chair up next to me and sits down.......I look up and see that it is a chick.......and immediately I am wondering .......hmmmm....is this one of the stripper chicks? I scope out her clothing......jeans and a shirt, with a Chicago Cubs fisherman style hat........not really the attire you see the "Entertainers" wearing.....she looks at me and says "Dont I know you from somewhere?" I try to think if I have ever seen her...........when I used to be in the Hardware stores, I met or saw a ton of people and dont remember most of them........so I tell her we might have met if she was ever at either store......she then notices my uniform shirt from work and asks where I work......we chat about that for a minute, then Mort the buddy from work rolls up and sits down on the other side of me.........I start to talk to him and kind of quit talking to the girly........then she starts rubbing my leg.......not up by the package or anything, but down by the knee.........and so I am like "hhhhmmmmmmm" I mean what really was going thru my head is "damn I am hella tired from last night with beer bottle chick and then work......I want to go to sleep......but maybe I can throw down some game on this chick and hook up with her someday".......I really did think that.......see when a guy scores one night he is all bold the next night because if he gets shut down he doesnt care, because he just experienced success not 24 hours before that, so what the hell, right?

I tell Mort I am going to try and throw some game at this gal and turn around to ignore the game and start talking to her.........she sees one of my tattoos hanging out from my shirtsleeve and asks about it......I pull up one sleeve and show her, then the other sleeve.......she asks if I have more, and I say yes.......she tells me she has a couple......then she asks if I have any piercings besides my ears (at this point I know that I have a chance......I mean besides the leg grabbing thing, she is asking all the right questions that spell out that she is freaky deaky) I tell her yes and stick out my tongue........she likes that one and tells me she used to have one in her tongue but took it out. She says she still has one 2 piercings that she has left in besides her ears.........I ask where they are and she giggles and tells me her nipple and her box (okay, she didnt say box.....she said some cutesy name that meant her box)...this intrigues me some more and I tell her that I also have my nipples done and that I have 2 other rings besides those........this makes her smile and start rubbing my leg a bit higher up from the knee.

It is getting really close to closing time and the waitress comes around for last call........we both order another drink and continue to chat...drinks arrive and she says "hey, what are you doing after this place closes"....I tell her that I am going home and going to bed.........she asks if I want to go with her to her place to have a drink first......I think it over and decide that yes, indeed this would maybe be a good move.....so she finishes her drink and tells runs over to tell her friend that she is leaving (a guy friend who she went to the bar with so he wouldnt have to go alone.......he introduces himself to me and he seems like a decent guy.....we say goodbye and head on out......while we are in the car driving to her place, the leg rubbing continues, but her hand has moved up quite a bit and is rapidly approaching Mr Happy........but not quite......in my head I am thinking.....damn, 2 chicks in 2 days.......how metal is that?

We arrive at her place and head inside, she asks if I want a drink........I say yep, and then we sit down on the couch.......she flips on the tv, then walks around and turns the lights out........so you have the tv glow lighting the room, but no real bright lights..........she says "well, are you going to show me the rest of your tattoos" I say sure and whip off the shirt.........she examines them commenting on them and all that and even pulls on my nipple rings for a bit......I ask her if she is going show me either of her piercings and she says sure and takes off her shirt....and bra......this is pretty cool, I decide to mimic her and reach over and play with her ring a little bit........she seems to enjoy this. But, then she stands up all of a sudden and hits mute on the tv.......I am like "damn, what happened" .........but not to worry, she doesnt put her shirt on or anything, she walks across the room and gets a cd case and brings it to me, telling me she feels like listening to music and wants me to pick on out..........I am thinking oh god.......here we go.....probably going to be some whack stuff like 98 degrees or something........maybe some Julio Iglesias.......but I pop open the cd case and was like damn! Lords of Acid, Ozzy, ICP, stuff like that........I am impressed and tell her this.......anyway I come across the Reverend Horton Heat, which I hadnt heard in a while and decide that is the romantic mood setting music to roll with..........she says cool and puts it in the cd player........she tells me that name of the cd always makes her laugh "Liquor in the Front, Poker in the Rear".........I tell her it is a good name for an album, and then she tells me it makes her laugh because it describes her pretty well, she like getting licked in the front and poked in the rear.........I am like (what?? this girl is volunteering that she likes it when a dude takes the dirt road). I am not sure how to respond so I just kind of take a drink and sit back.........then I decide to go for it and say "yep, that does sound like fun" we chat for a few minutes.......keep in mind we both still have our shirts off........and then I get all bold and say "well, are you going to show me your other piercing?" She smiles and says sure.......pulls off her jeans and drawers (and point in her favor........she was rocking the thong....you all know how I am about that) she sits back down, leans back and spreads her legs so I can take a good look....and before you ask, yes it was clean shaven and looked very very good...............I check it out and reach over to tug on it a bit........but then after a few seconds, she pushes my hand away and says "I want to see yours now" so i am like.....okey dokey and strip off the pants and boxers......she gets down on her knees in front of me and is checking the rings out, pulling on them a little bit and all that then just starts sucking ..........I am kind of shocked, I expected she would do it, but just not that quick......hadnt kissed this girl or anything yet.........but who am I to complain, huh? She does that for a while and I pull her back up on the couch and start being all tender and sexy and whatnot.........you know playing with the boobs, kissing her neck, start rubbing the box, etc.........

Guys know what I was doing........I was doing the old stealthy sniff test.........you know, you mess with the box, then itch your face and sneak a sniff to find out if there are any funky odors or anything...........and nope, this was one of the good ones..........I kind of smiled to myself and pushed her back and dove in..........didnt last very long before she was squirming about a lot so I lift up my face to watch her, but continued working her with my hand and all of a sudden...........flood.........I was like damn!!!!!!! I thought she pissed on me and said just that......she kind of covered her face and told me no, when she gets really excited, she squirts........

What? All these years I always thought that was just some kind of trick they played with water in the pornos........never imagined that it really happened........but yep....take my word for it, it does happen.

Anyway, this excites me to no end, I think mainly because I have never encountered it before, so I want to try and make it happen again....I go back to work and it couldnt have been even 2 minutes later....she started to do the squirmy shake again, so this time I pull my face away and sit up, but instead of rubbing the sensitive little spot, I make my hand really flat and lightly slap at it........she goes insane and the fountain happens.......I mean I am watching for it and see it literally shooting out.....I am like damn! This is cool! I go back to work.......it happens again.........I decide, hey this is fricking cool, I then tell her this is fun and I am going to count how many geysers erupt for her that night....she laughs and tells me it is my turn for a while.....I am not one to complain or be difficult, so we switch spots and she goes to work..........and does it really well, slapping herself in the face with the wang, slurping on the balls, working the "chud" with the tongue, all that great stuff........I am digging it......anyway, this goes on for a while then we switch spots.......to keep this semi short, we keep trading spaces like this for a long time.........and the count of geysers gets up to like 16 or 17, something like that.........then while I am down on her again I decide it is the time.......so I kind of push her legs all the way back and start pumping......and guess what.........yep quivering and shaking.....I yank out and slap at it until the geyser happens.....this happens another couple times and we get up to 21........no kidding.......21 damn geysers........anyway, she kind of closes her legs and pushes me back........I figure she wants to change positions or something, but she says "wait here" and goes to the bathroom.....

I am just sitting there laughing to myself........you know, I was like "damn.......I met this gal like an hour and half ago, this is wild".........she then comes back and hands me a latex glove.....I am like "huh" and she says remember earlier I told you I liked it in the ass........well, put on that glove and get my ass ready .........I follow orders and put on the glove and she tells me to lie down, then gets in kind of a 69 style position and I utilize my mouth on the box and my freshly gloved hand on the old balloon knot.........she really squirms and stuff during this......and as soon as she gets me a slab of raging petrified wood, she jumps down on the floor on all fours and says "okay now give it to me" . I follow her instructions.........and it is fun, she does indeed enjoy this. I tell her that I am almost done and she says to pull out when I am ready, I do this, and kind of roll her over and finish off by spanking one off on her belly/boobies/neck (there was kind of a lot). We both light up smokes and just kick back for a bit.......then I say I should get going, as I have to work the next day......we exchange phone numbers and I head out........we hooked up again that weekend.........and I got to see her make out with a chick, but nowhere near as exciting as the first time.........hahaha, good story, right?

Well, hell sorry for the kind of abrupt ending there, the Aunt just arrived from Michigan, so I need to run upstairs.......leave me some damn comments!

Oh yeah, Miss Megan, when you read this.......hi! I miss you bunches, wish I could see you, dammit.........and hopefully you get a laugh out of this story.........you have already heard it...........but that was over the phone, it is always funnier when you read it.